anecdotes / humor / Uncategorized

When Groundhogs Attack!


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The official Groundhog, Punxsutawney Phil, has declared an early Spring for us. That seems about right, because last week we were iced-in, and this week it’s been 70 and sunny.

Much like Santa, Phil has helpers, who are basically the equivalent of Mall Santas. Some are good, some are okay, and some are bad-to-the bone.


Bad Santa




When you work at a science museum, there’s not a lot of juicy gossip. “Did you hear that thing about Darwin?” “No, tell me, and don’t leave out any details.” “He theorized evolution.” Umm..ok..already knew that.

Today was a little bit different though, and that’s due to one disgraced Groundhog, and his contraversial replacement.

Last year on this day, the Groundhog that the museum brought in, attacked his handler and drew blood. Apparently there was a photo of the Groundhog with blood dripping from its mouth. That photo could have gone viral, but I guess the scientists had more self control than me.

The Groundhog was fired, but he technically works for the state, so I’m sure he received a nice severance package.

Who would be his replacement? Many resumes were submitted and strict criteria had to be met. The applicant had to be affable,a non-biter, and Ground-Hog-ey.

After a rigorous background check, one such applicant met the requirements, but he had a dirty little secret.

Shhh. Don’t tell anyone, especially not the kids, but this Groundhog was blind. Not corrective lenses blind. Ray Charles blind. 

I’m sure he would have liked to see his shadow, or anything for that matter,but science says no.

The kids had no idea, so the magic factor still prevails. 

It’s all superstition…or is it?


Whatever you believe, I hope you have a short winter,and a sunny Spring with warm breezes and an eye-full of adorable baby creatures!

4 thoughts on “When Groundhogs Attack!

  1. That was the best news in a long time, Kim. I can’t wait for Spring. I have my crocus planted near my front walkway and it’s always a welcome sign when they bloom.

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