Exercising Like A Typical American

No one wants to be typical and being stereotypical is a thirteen letter four letter word. Many Americans are shining examples of fitness and I applaud those individuals (while slightly despising them).Despite those worthy examples, America is known far and wide for cheeseburger and soda consumption. In fact, in Finnish schools there is a portion of the curriculum that highlights the ‘typical American’. The text books include photos of Ronald McDonald, Coke, Pepsi and Michael Jackson. It’s embarrassing!

I used to work out six times a week but that has not been the case for many moons. 

I’m a Yogi now! By that I mean I have done two yoga workouts in the past week. These exercises were performed via Hulu in my own home and I used a towel instead of a yoga mat. While in upward dog my own dog Lucy attempted to plop her spoiled little but down on my yoga towel several times.

This American struggled through the exercises and cursed at the zen-like instructor as she effortlessly rolled her rockin’ body in to downward dog and urged me to do push-ups. After two very sad push-ups I melted in to a prostrate position as Lucy moved in to lick my face. I like to think she was concerned but it’s more probable that she just liked the salty taste of fresh sweat.

I’m honestly proud of myself that I (mostly) made it through two work outs. 

Here’s what I’m not proud about but will tell you anyway:

After the first work out, I rewarded myself with a chocolate and peanut covered ice cream cone.

After the second work out, I lifted up my shirt while looking in the mirror and was genuinely surprised and disappointed that I did not see gleaming six-packs in my reflection.

Americans are a ‘fast food nation’ and as a result, we often expect immediate gratification. 

I didn’t think I was guilty of that inclination but obviously I am. 

The truth is this: every muscle aches after my two yoga work-outs. It hurts but I like it. Every sore spot feels like an accomplishment. 

Americans often opt out of the real work that is required for fitness and choose elective surgeries instead. Some truly need the help but I feel that most are just looking for a short-term fix.

This American will choose to look like a complete idiot on her beach towel while being judged by her dog. I will roll my back in to downward dog awkwardly and it will not be sexy but it will be shaky. 

I will create my own results and I might never again look like the 20 year old version of myself.

With a little hard work I hope to look like the best version of my 34 year old self.

***Ice cream cone and annoying dog not included***

On a side note: aside from yoga I have been using my super old school exercise bike for the past month. I’ve jumped on for no more than 5 minutes at a time almost every day and have pedaled my little heart out. Derek is a “butt guy”. When we met, a quarter could have been bounced off of my ass but since then it’s gotten a bit jiggly. Sometimes when I have a bad day I’ll tell Derek about it and he uses humor to bring me out of the gray. He almost always cups my butt cheeks and says “does this help?”. It never does but he gets to cop a feel while “comforting me” and we laugh. This past week I was down and he reverted to his “signature move”. This time, as he copped a feel he said “have you been working out?”.

Yes I have. 


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s